Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim's epilogue to the Frog and Scorpion story

Let’s look at this story closer. How are you going to deal with your bad habits, when they come to you again and again, trying to lull you into giving in to them? Are you ready to fight back?

Instead of being inflexible like the scorpion and regarding your bad habits as “just your nature,” or “just the way you are,” why not try another approach? Let’s assume for a moment that your negative traits are beliefs that you have adopted about yourself, and that you can use your will power to begin the process of conquering them. If you have beliefs like “I’m lazy,” “I’m shy,” “I’m useless,” “I’m poor,” “I’m stupid,” let’s ask, what do you get out of these beliefs? If you’re holding on to them so tightly, you must be getting something you think you want. But is it happiness you’re getting? Success? Achievement? Growth? I really doubt if you’re getting anything good from those beliefs.

If you really want to change your life, you may have to see that what you’re really getting out of these beliefs is an excuse not to face up to some fear or weakness you have. As long as you believe you’re lazy, will you focus your will on going to school to learn something new? No, because if your laziness is really a fear of failure, you won’t test yourself in school. As long as you believe you’re shy, will you use your will power to seek out a new, more fulfilling career in which you have to meet many people? No, because if your shyness is really fear of talking to others, you’ll keep your undesirable present job where there are few people. In both of theses situations, you are afraid, not really lazy, and not really shy.

But feelings of limitations are so unnecessary. Fear can be conquered! Weakness can be overcome! Each time you use your will power to stand up and throw yourself into the face of another “I can’t,” you are getting ready for a victory. So, you begin to identify your fears and weaknesses, and start to confront them.

Realize that “I Can’t” usually means, “I won’t.”

All of us, at some time or another, have felt the limiting power of “I can’t.” Even when we really want something, and even if that something is within our power, those two simple words can prevent it from happening. When you find yourself saying, “I can’t,” look deeper to see if you’re making another excuse. If you look honestly, you will usually find that your words “I can’t” actually mean, “I could, but I won’t for this or that reason.” For instance, “I can’t do well in school” might easily mean, “I could do well in school but I won’t put in the time and effort to study.” When you become willing to say, “I can,” you find the power to carry it out from your Silent Master within.

So, when your old habits want to come creeping back, when your old self wants to take over again, know that you have the power to change. The power is in you; it is your personal choice what you do in your life! Take charge of your life!